Skiing & Brexit

Here at NeveFest, we're only serious about providing the most noteworthy skiing and snowboarding holidays in Europe. Hence we produced the "worlds most serious Skiing & Brexit opinion poll", ever! And YOU TOO can use it to personally gain the most serious Brexit outcome for you! We think you'll like our Brexit outcomes - don't forget to share with your skiing and snowboarding friends!

How big is the European Union Snow Mountain?

Seventeen quintillion tons Not big enough! Why do they waste the money on this?

Where do they store it?

In a secret chamber off the Mont Blanc Tunnel In Jean-Claude Junker’s back garden Southern Greece, it’s all about transferring economic assets to poorer areas

What will the effect of Brexit be on UK snow imports?

None. We’ll just do a deal with Canada, they’ve got loads Serious shortages in Scotland Major holdups at the snow pipeline terminal in Dover. Economy in meltdown

How will this affect the Irish Border?

The border won’t be so frictionless Major snow pileup: glaciers will build up and flow south (or north, depending) causing huge economic leveling The IRA will develop high velocity snowball cannon

What about piste grading?

No change, except they will all go uphill If there is a Labour victory in the UK, all British skiers will use the same gradient EU standards will only apply to EU citizens. Brits will be required to ignore all grading signs

Ski or board: which is more patriotic?

Dammit Sir, the Brits invented the sport of skiing don’cha know? We will adopt the Norwegian agreement. This means a lot more cross-country Because boarding was a North American invention, we will have to wait for Trump to pronounce (pronounce anything), correctly. Unless it was the Canadians, in which case, sorry guys

What about apres ski?

We will continue the secret programme of opening British breweries in France Brits will have to present a passport to drink Vin Chaud/Gluhwein and Jagerbombs. This will make for a much quieter time in St. Anton A license will be required for dancing in ski boots. NOTE: NeveFest will provide free licenses!